Honestly, I didn't think I'd be writing this on Sunday. I thought I'd be gone for a few more days. But I just broke down, logged on, and started typing. My blog has always been first and foremost: a place where I can escape and vent. That started way back in 7th grade on Livejournal. Those entries are embarrassing, the 8th & 9th grade ones were not much better though.
This is going to be a big mush of feelings and ideas in one place so be prepared. Last week, my Uncle, after fighting 9 grueling months against stage 4 colon cancer, past away. It happened much faster than we anticipated. I have to say before I talk about the bad feelings that I am insanely blessed to be surrounded the strongest people that I'm so lucky to call my family. I know they've kept me from falling to pieces these past few months and this will be no different. Despite the tears and broken hearts, we were able to sit around the table the next morning talking about really good things thanks to our firm foundation in what God is doing in all of our lives. His services will be Monday and Tuesday, which my aunt accommodated for me to start school. (If that isn't support, I don't know what is.) It's been really rough to say the least. The people I expected to comfort me, just aren't here and that has been hard, but it's life. You make do and it's in these moments you truly learn who loves you at your weakest.
“It happens to everyone as they grow up. You find out who you are and what you want, and then you realize that people you’ve known forever don’t see things the way you do. So you keep the wonderful memories, but find yourself moving on.”- Nicholas Sparks
Yesterday I had my final orientation at Le Cordon Bleu and I picked up my uniform, books, and schedule. It was truly hitting me. After a long time, almost a year, I'm finally going back to school and doing something I want to do. Last night, I read ahead in all my textbooks, planned out my schedule in my planner, wrote my classes in my notebooks, and put together all of my pens and binders! It was insanely exciting. I can't believe it's tomorrow...I didn't think it would ever come.
But in the midst of the excitement, I wish you were sharing it with me. I know these are my dreams and you only gave me the push and support I needed. It only makes me further believe that we're Rachel and Finn on Glee. (yes, I do make Glee relationship comparisons frequently). So for now, I will venture on this journey alone and it will be enough for me. But when you're ready, so am I.
This post is mostly for me. So later on, I'll be posting a recipe!! :) Thanks for sticking by me, loves.