August 23, 2010

Weekends.

It's weird. I actually got out this weekend. I spent all Friday sleeping in and then with Kiara. Oh how I've missed best friend. I finally got out everything I've been holding in about everything. She understood me one hundred percent and it was so great to just have someone listen and just get it. We shopped a lot and then just lounged in Barnes and Noble on our Nook's. It was so perfectly relaxing. We met up with Cait and went to Yogurtland and cried and laughed and talked together just like old times and it felt so good to be back with them. I bought a new e-Book yesterday, "Water for Elephants," after previewing it in B&N on Friday and I'm falling head over heels for the story. I'm excited they're making a movie too!! I also showed houses and cross your fingers I might have one closing!! YES YES YES! I'm so excited.

This whole weekend I couldn't get this whole mixed up messed up dramatic summer out of my head. It was nothing that I ever hoped for or wished for or expected in the least. I had this awesome tight unit of friends and we were like a family. I had a best friend going back home to San Diego and a sister moving in to my house for the summer. Everything on the surface seemed fine and dandy come the beginning of June, but it really wasn't. In reality, there were cracks and breaks everywhere in the foundations of these relationships I was relying on. Little rocks that hit windshields of cars start out as small chips, but with heat and pressure (two things summer was definitely not lacking in) they began to expand and spread and without repair, your whole windshield will need replacing. No we're not talking windshields for me. We're talking friendships, but most of these ended up this way. They needed replacing after cracks were too big to repair. There were too many dramatic fights, texts, tears, words. But coming to this point, I've realized so much. My summer hasn't really ended, it's still 115 degrees out, and I'm not in school. But this "summer" was a season. It was a season of rough endings, new beginnings, and welcome realizations. I'm better off. I'm MUCH better off without some of the people in my life who were clouding my judgments, but there are some I miss. Sam left this week for Flag and we didn't say goodbye to eachother. This was going to be our summer prepping for MCC and finally enjoying being here in Chandler, but we definitely decided otherwise and supported each other for the best because we're going to be SO much happier. I'm ready to move on from summer 2010. I'm ready for the fall and for my wonderful cardigans to reappear in my wardrobe.

 P.S. I'm hoping your loving the new layout as much as I am!!! :) EEEp.

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